Thursday, January 26, 2006

Howard The Duck


Howard Dean spent the better part of his interview this morning on NBC's The Today Show not answering the questions presented to him by Katie Couric. To be completely fair, Ms. Couric must have been under a trance this morning, because instead of her usual softball questions she lobs to liberal guests she actually attacked and one point cut off Howard because he was ducking too many of her questions.

So, for those of you that don't have the stomach to sit through even a few minutes of The Today Show, In A Word is here for you with a brief synopsis:

Katie Couric's Legs
: Mr. Dean, if it is determined the NSA wiretappings are illegal, what other means of tracking the terrorists do the Democrats have to offer?

Howard the Duck
: Well Katie, we aren't the party currently in power so frankly we don't have to present a position on that.

Katie Couric's Legs: Can you offer America the Democrat's top five priorities?

Howard the Duck: If we regain power I can tell you we will address:
  • 1st: Why there is always about 15 unpopped kernels of microwave popcorn in a bag? This is a huge waste that the Republican government continues to ignore.
  • 2nd: A federal investigation into the canceling of NBC's the West Wing.
  • 3rd: The creation of Hugo Chavez Day as a federal holiday.
  • 4th: And finally helping more old ladies cross the street than ever before!
Katie Couric's Legs: Um, you forgot to list your fifth priority.

Howard the Duck: Democrats did not take one nickel for Jack Abramoff. Not one Nickel! Arrrghhh!

The interview ended with Howard the Duck trying to click his red wing tips together and continuing to chant "Democrats did not take one nickel, Democrats did not take one nickel, Democrats did not take one nickel."

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