Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Rudy The Conservative

A 'stop Rudy' campaign has already started among the ultra-conservatives, citing his three marriages [I mean who has one now a days away...really. The first one is more to kick the tires and take a test drive], his support of gay marriages [hey, we've all had those thoughts before so there's so use denying them. What you haven't had those thoughts? Well neither have I; just speculating], his pro-choice stance and finally his belief in strong gun control.

Where here is an article detailing Rudy's conservative qualifications on things that really matter. You running the nation. While I disagree with Rudy on gun control and abortion, he will likely not be able to affect those from the White House. I believe in controlling guns by enforcing the laws we already have in place. And Rudy's stance on abortion? The supreme court will ultimately decide that and here is a quote from Giuliani on Bush's supreme court judge appointments:
"Supreme Court Chief Justice Roberts and Justice Alito are models of what judges should be in this country." - November 5, 2006
After reading City Journal article, Giuliani sounds like a Reagan-ite.

H/T: Ace Of Spades

The Audacity

In Barack Obama's memoir, The Audacity Of Hope, he commented "the arguments of liberals are more often grounded in reason and fact." It should be noted however that Barack's assertion contained no reason and isn't based on any facts.

Just throwin' that out there..

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Was 9/11 really that bad?

We all knew this day was coming. The sting and raw emotion of September 11th, 2001 would numb through the passing of the years. Eventually the fall of the Twin Towers would be nothing more than an event that backed up traffic in Manhattan for few days. The hatred from the left towards George W. Bush would grow to a level that has liberal questioning the very foundation that the whole war on Terrorism is founded on...the attacks of 9/11/. Leave it to the LA Times and writer David A. Bell for leading the way:
Has the American reaction to the attacks in fact been a massive overreaction? Is the widespread belief that 9/11 plunged us into one of the deadliest struggles of our time simply wrong? If we did overreact, why did we do so? Does history provide any insight?

The people who attacked us in 2001 are indeed hate-filled fanatics who would like nothing better than to destroy this country. But desire is not the same thing as capacity, and although Islamist extremists can certainly do huge amounts of harm around the world, it is quite different to suggest that they can threaten the existence of the United States.

Yet a great many Americans, particularly on the right, have failed to make this distinction. For them, the "Islamo-fascist" enemy has inherited not just Adolf Hitler's implacable hatreds but his capacity to destroy.

But it is no disrespect to the victims of 9/11, or to the men and women of our armed forces, to say that, by the standards of past wars, the war against terrorism has so far inflicted a very small human cost on the United States. As an instance of mass murder, the attacks were unspeakable, but they still pale in comparison with any number of military assaults on civilian targets of the recent past, from Hiroshima on down.

In a recent book, for instance, political scientist John Mueller evaluated the threat that terrorists pose to the United States and convincingly concluded that it has been, to quote his title, "Overblown." But he undercut his own argument by adding that the United States has overreacted to every threat in its recent history, including even Pearl Harbor (rather than trying to defeat Japan, he argued, we should have tried containment!).

Yet as the comparison with the Soviet experience should remind us, the war against terrorism has not yet been much of a war at all, let alone a war to end all wars. It is a messy, difficult, long-term struggle against exceptionally dangerous criminals who actually like nothing better than being put on the same level of historical importance as Hitler — can you imagine a better recruiting tool? To fight them effectively, we need coolness, resolve and stamina. But we also need to overcome long habit and remind ourselves that not every enemy is in fact a threat to our existence.

Well there you have it, America overreacts. The fact that Bell includes someone's assessment that the American response to Pearl Harbor was wrong completely blows away any credibility I may have given the rest of the article.

And according to Bell the only thing we need to combat terrorism is "coolnees, resolve and stamina." What the fuck does that mean? Give the terrorists the Sears Towers filled with people?

Five years...five short years...

Forget all the other issues I disagree with Democrats and liberals on from abortion to taxes to minimum wage to socialized services, it's their aloofness to the threats facing this country that truly bothers me. Maybe to Bell 3,000 deaths isn't a lot, but it demands context.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Giuliani Announces Re-Election Plans For 2012

Des Moines - During a quick stop in Iowa to start off the week, 2008 Republican Presidential hopeful Rudy Giuliani announced he will be seeking re-election during the 2012 Presidential cycle. While announcing a re-election plans before actually winning the current election is a bold move, Giuliani cited a desire to stay out in front of any future rivals.

"The 2008 campaign will no doubt be a grueling experience and we will be tackling some tough issue during my Presidency, so it stands to reason that our successes will springboard us to a second term," Giuliani explained Monday while speaking with potential 2012 voters at a Martin Luther King J. Elementary prep rally.

At least initially it appears Giuliani's strategy is paying. After taking a quick pulse of the 6th graders at King Elementary, it was clear Giuliani's message was resonating.

"He has meet Alex Rodriquez and the entire New York Yankees team... I mean how cool is that?" a clearly energized Billy Hall [12] said.

"Yeah, then he went on to detail the correct strategy for beating the Twill Dragon boss at the end of the sixth dungeon in the new Legend of Zelda game," Hall continued. "So many politicians come in claiming knowledge about video games, but then ask you if you have ever played Pac-Man. Lame-o. But when Rudy said you use the Double Clawshot to reach the Dragon's back to defeat it...I knew right then he was the candidate for me."

Giuliani's 2012 campaign manager, Mary Allen, said the general public should expect to starting seeing TV ads as early as next week. In an effort to reach the desired 2012 voter demographic, Allen said the commercials would be seen during such shows like: Yu-Gi-Oh! and One Piece.

Sunday, January 28, 2007


WASHINGTON D.C. - In keeping with the Democrats' ambitious first hundred days of congress, Rep. Eliot Engel [D-NY] has introduced a bill calling for the criminalizing of "wanton proliferation of loose ball point pens." The legislation calls for all businesses with 5 or more walk-in customers a day to firmly secure their pens to the sales counter or face escalating fees.

"I ask you, when was the last time you actually threw away a pen because it was completely used up?" Engel rhetorically asked the gathered press crew, "Pens discarded prematurely account for 0.00006% of our landfills and it's high time businesses are held accountable for their blatant disregard for inkular waste."

"If you took all the excess pens unused each year in the US and placed them end to end they would circle the combined egos of Ted Kennedy, John Kerry, Charlie Rangel, and Harry Reid almost 2 times. So the problem is clearly not disappearing," Engel continued, "There are illiterate children in Ethiopia that would love a slightly used Rondo ball-point pen and we have a global responsibility to reign in our pendic consumption."

Business leaders maintain unencumbered pens are a service to their customers and expressed a desire to the keep the obstacles while writing a check for goods and services at a minimum.

"Businesses across the nation have always taken a proactive approach to securing wayward Bic and PaperMates," Thomas J. Donohue, president of US Chamber of Commerce said in statement issued on behalf of small businesses across America, "However the kleptomania in our customers has outpaced the pen chain technology."

Engel refused to acknowledge the businesses concerns, saying their time to act had passed.

"Clearly taping plastic spoons and silk flowers to Uni-Ball Jetstreams isn't working," Engel said, "so as with most things in life if you want it done right you have to involve the government."

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Join Rudy 2008

Here is a link to sign up for Rudy Giuliani newsletters and to get the last updates regarding his exploratory committee for the Presidency.

Fair warning...I will be writing about Giuliani a lot in the coming years, so brace yourself.

Friday, January 26, 2007

Two Americas...

As if to prove his own campaign slogan, Democratic Presidential John Edwards hopeful has just moved in a new house with an accessed tax value of $6M.

It's 28,200 sq ft of unabashed liberal rumpus room. It even has a special room just for Edwards himself, labeled "John's lounge" or "the John" for short.

Doug Powers notes that the sprawling acreage looks kind of phallic in nature...not that there's anything wrong with that.

At least it's nice to know where some of the money has gone from the price of skyrocketing health care due to malpractice suits...

Reprinted from The Corn Beltway Boys.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Caption Contest

Do your worst...

Here's one to start you off:

"You is your Jew-hatin' holocaust denying daddy?"

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Corn Beltway Boys Revised Cordless Power Tool Of The Week

I knew as soon as I posted my cordless power tool of the week on Monday that some Democrat would go and make me foolish for not wanting until Friday. I thought I was safe blasting Steve Kagen [D-WI] for making up his run ins with the Bush administration, but what I failed to foresee was the potential disease of east coast liberals. I have learned my lesson and from now on my Cordless Power Tool Of The Week will only appear on Fridays. Damn you Democrats....damn you!

My I introduce to you: Rep. Jerrold Nadler [D-NY]. Get your duct tape ready and a few aspirin for pain:
"The villains are no longer the terrorists," Nadler said yesterday at a news conference in Washington.

"The villains live in the White House and in Gracie Mansion, or at least lived in Gracie Mansion in the last administration, and in the governor's office."

During an interview with the Daily News, Nadler (D-Manhattan) blamed the Bush administration for lying to the public about environmental conditions in lower Manhattan, blamed Giuliani for failing to protect Ground Zero rescue workers and blamed Bloomberg for failing to help workers who are dying today.
It hasn't been announced yet, but I am sure somebody in Nadler's office is working diligently on the damage control for his reckless grandstanding. Don't blame terrorists who caused the environmental problems, rather remove their villain tag and put it on your countrymen. Welcome America, to the party you put in power. You have two more years of this crap...enjoy.

Rudy Giuliani can seal the 2008 GOP Presidential nomination if he comes out tells Nadler to "shut the fuck up." He'll win the Presidency if actually cusses.

This post reprinted from the Corn Beltway Boys

When Life Hands You Lemons...Blame Bush

Oliver Stone claims his movie "World Trade Center" did poorly at the box office largely because Bush and the Iraq war. Apparently the negative attitude that Bush has created among the rest of the world for his unpopular war has transcended movie ticket sales.
"We got nasty reviews everywhere. The highbrow press in England hated it. Germany was the worst, then Spain. Even Russia. The whole world is politicised by George Bush and Iraq. You really feel it. Anti-Americanism is rampant so it was a very threatening time to bring this movie out."
Stone hates Bush. The film critics of the world hate Bush. So in order to get back at Bush the movie reviews bash Stone. The only thing that would make that line of reasoning more plausible is if the movie reviewers were writing their critiques from a grassy knoll. I know I routinely level my harshest criticism by attacking the people that feel the same way I do. In fact, just yesterday I calling Bush's health care initiative the stupidest idea I had ever heard of, but I was actually attacking the Democrats for raising the minimum wage. It kind of a reverse psychology thingy.

I realize whenever a Hollywood liberal fails there must be a conservative conspiracy behind it, but if by chance this wasn't the case here's what I think happened. The World Trade Center movie was well made, but not great. Regardless of what Stone believes, he is not perfect. The reviews were honest depictions of Stone's movie and not Bush's approval ratings. Coupled with the fact that WTC debuted after United 93, there is a chance the movie going public had grown weary of 9/11 films. After all there probably is a reason why there isn't a Shindler's List II.

In the end though, it was probably a conspiracy...

Reprinted for The Corn Beltway Boys

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Caught In A Webb

So the President delivered his State of the Union, which is generally all positive aside from the war in Iraq. Then the Democrats countered with a largely negative response. The Democratic reply to the State of the Union was handled by freshman senator Jim Webb of Virginia. As we have grown accustomed to, he was heavy on criticism and light on solutions. However, most disturbing were a few points that I believe Webb should be held to. The first is this statement:

"The majority of the nation no longer supports the way this war is being fought; nor does the majority of our military."

The majority of our military? I hope Republicans and the press make him back that statement up. And a majority doesn't constitute the opinions of retired generals that have emboldened the Democratic whining, but rather those troops and leaders currently engaged in battle. Of those brave men, is there a majority that is against this war? If so, it would greatly change my opinion on the war and I would love for Sen. Webb to produce his references.

Webb ended with this:

"Tonight we are calling on this President to take similar action, in both areas. If he does, we will join him. If he does not, we will be showing him the way."

Ewww...that sounds tough, but I am not holding my breath. In order for Webb and the Democrats to show the President the way they would actually need to know the route. The Democrats can tell you want is wrong with this country, but they stop short of supplying any answers.

After their ambitious "first 100 hours" pledge to get some real legislation passed for America, their biggest victory is giving 6% of the population a raise. I don't suppose it would be asking to much if they would get around to helping the other 94%?

I Was Wrong

I decided I was wrong about the issue of increasing the minimum wage. The Des Moines Register has two "wonderful" articles addressing the minimum wage. As usual, the articles are so well written by the Register's staff that I have completely changed my stance. I am now officially for giving 6% of the population a raise. I am now for giving those people a raise that wouldn't otherwise get off their ass and get one on their own. In fact, so great is my 180 degree turn on this issue, that I am calling for a greater minimum wage increase. Two dollars an hour is for chumps.

If increasing the minimum wage works as the Democrats claim, I say set it at $150 an hour. After all if you're going to do, lets do it right.

As for my "Red Herring" posts? Nothing more the lunatic ravings of an oppressive small business owner lording over his slaves while profiting on the blood and sweat of the wretched.

Reprinted from the Corn Beltway Boys

Monday, January 22, 2007

Corn Beltway Boys' Cordless Power Tool Of The Week

I realize the week just started, but someone will be hard pressed to "out do" this loser:

U.S. Rep. Steve Kagen [D-Wi]

Kagen used a meeting with peace activists to lob a few pot shots at the Bush administration and Karl Rove. The problem? The facts seem a little hazy.
In a letter to constituents in the 8th District, Kagen, D-Appleton, called the situation a "distraction" he allowed to "get out of hand and divert our attention from the critically important work we're doing.

"My mishandled attempt at humor wasn't delivered or received well. It won't happen again."

During a Dec. 19 meeting with peace activists, the freshman lawmaker reportedly bragged about having blocked the door to a men's room and telling Republican political adviser Karl Rove, "I kicked your ass."

He went on to say he thanked Vice President Dick Cheney and President Bush for helping him win the election and deliberately called first lady Laura Bush "Barbara."

"I learned on the campaign that the meanest thing you can say to another gentleman is, 'he's a fine fellow,' and you then refer to his spouse by a different name," Kagen said in a published report.

The White House denied the story and labeled the accounts as "ridiculous."
Rove has been on record as saying he offered congratulations to Kagen on his victory, however he denies Kagen was as forceful as he says he was. Rove did say that it was a little creepy having Kagen stand behind him at the urinal and he said if had known Kagen liked to stare at other men peeing he would have used the stall. President Bush is also to have said to made an attempt to reach out to Kagen, but it was during that exchange when Kagen called the First Lady "Barbara." Now Kagen is back peddling because his flippant attitude as generated him some serious negative press. In fact, to defuse the self-inflicted incident of stupidity, Kagel had to mail a letter to his constituents [parts of the quoted passage you just read].

My favorite part of this story? When Kagen says the whole foolish calamity was merely an "attempt at humor." Now where have I heard that before? Is anyone else tired of this reasoning? Considering no one has ever heard either Kagen or Kerry tell a joke, I don't see how they can use it as an excuse. It truly begs the question: is it a joke or humor if no one laughs?

Of course, it goes without saying a few liberals have adopted Kagen as their hero.

Don't worry though, Kagen is "committed to put(ing) partisanship aside," as he plans on calling Barak Obama's wife "Micheal."

My runner up for CBB's Cordless Power Tool Of The Week: the blog Surviving Yepsen. As I always's funny in a sad, pathetic liberal sorta way...

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Culver Announces 'Literacy For Lugz'

Des Moines-CBB Coming just days after Iowa's newest governor, Chet Culver, butchered the word "literacy" his administration has launched 'Literacy For Lugz." A top down approach to reading and writing that starts at the governor's mansion.

"Chet's speeches give us continual reminders that no sector of our society is immune to illiteracy," Culver press secretary Courtney Greene said, "through Chet's incompetence we can show thousands of children that you can be a complete idiot yet still achieve greatness."

Although still in the preliminary planning stages, Governor Culver expressed a great deal of confidence in the proposed program.

"By starting yearly litmusy tests, we can prevent future generators of children from falling through the crackers."

Reprinted for Corn Beltway Boys

My Cup Runneth Over

First the Iowa elects its' stupidest governor. Ever.

Now Hillary Clinton announces she running for the White House. Of course it was a move that was inevitable since Bill stained Monica's dress and Hillary "stood by her man" while carpetbagging in New York. I am no doubt going to need a barf bag for this election, but it will be fun none the less...

Reprinted from Corn Beltway Boys

Avatar Hosting

Friday, January 19, 2007

The Ministry Of Silly Links

It's Friday and I am tired of politics so here are a few links:

Hot Dog for Homophobes

Idiot driver

Polaroid prank

A little truth from the media

The Racist GPS

The ghost ride the whip

Too Many Chiefs

You think the Iraq war has been mishandled? You ain't seen nuthin' yet...
Democratic leaders in Congress lobbed a warning shot Friday at the White House not to launch an attack against Iran without first seeking approval from lawmakers.

"The president does not have the authority to launch military action in Iran without first seeking congressional authorization," Senate Democratic leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., told the National Press Club.
Now I've played a few games of Risk before and I've learned that if I tell my opponents what I am planning to do before I do it doesn't lead to the desired outcome I had hoped for.

Just imagine this scenario:

Bush decides to attack Iran, Bush must go to congress to ask permission to play with his military toys, Congress openly debates the President's proposal, newspapers write countless stories, bloggers write millions of posts, and then finally congress approves the military strikes. Any guess on whether or not Iran will be surprised?

Congress can't balance a budget or figure out how to solve problems with social security, the last thing I want them doing is throttling the President's ability to wage war. Forget Bush or the Iraq war for a moment, this just isn't a precedent I think we should be setting.

When Debating A Liberal Make Sure You Bring A Pooper Scooper

"Woman Claims Dog Feces Is Political Expression"

The lawyer for an ex-professor accused of leaving dog feces at a congresswoman's office said her client's actions qualify as protected speech under the First Amendment.
Is anyone surprised that the accused is a retired college professor? Anyone?
"What she did was probably crude and boorish," Patricia Bangert, one of Ensz's attorneys, argued during a hearing Tuesday, when she likened the conduct to a form of political protest such as Jefferson's criticism of the King of England.
Probably crude and boorish? Likened the conduct to Jefferson's criticism of the King of England? You gotta love lawyers. Someone scoops up dog crap and places it on an opponent's doorstep and it rivals the actions of a great American patriot.

I believe Thomas Jefferson said it best when he said: "I fart in your general direction."

34% Of Democrats Want The Iraq War To Fail

Here's a depressing poll:
Do you personally want the Iraq plan President Bush announced last week to succeed?

Overall: 63% Yes 22% No 15% Don’t Know

Democrats: 51% Yes 34% No 15% Don’t Know

Republicans: 79% Yes 11% No 10% Don’t Know

Independents 63% Yes 19% No 17% Don’t Know
49% of all Democrats, you know the ones who "support the troops," don't want Bush's increased troop levels to work or don't know if they want it to work. I guess here is where having blind patriotism is clouding my judgment, but my answer to this question would have been different. Bush controls troop deployment. The increase is going to happen, to that there is no discussion. Knowing the increase is going to happen no matter what some stupid opinion poll of Monday morning, arm chair strategic war planners says, "wanting" the additional troop levels to end the violence is the ONLY answer. If the troop increase succeeds, the troops come home. Having them fail will only keep them there longer.

To be fair, 22% of Republicans feel the same way as the Defeatocrats. I just can't imagine wanting the troops to fail. Hate George Bush if you must. Hate the war. But for God's sake WANT the troops to succeed.

Well this seals it for me...Americans are a bunch of fucking idiots whose think their opinions matters. Of course I say that while I write a blog post...oh how I do love irony.

H/T: Ace Of Spades

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Erecting A Momument To Prostitution

It's being reported that Amsterdam is to receive a statue in dedication to the real working girls around the world:
The statue represents a self-assured woman, her hands on her hips, looking sideways towards the sky, and standing on a doorstep, ANP said.

The precise place where the statue will be laid and its title have not yet been announced, it said.

Did the news article just say they have not announced the precise the place the statue will be laid?

Well crap I've got nothing else, the reporter already took the best joke...

Monday, January 15, 2007


Ah Chet, it's going to be a glorious four years. Granted your policy decisions will likely run me out of business, but as far as blogging is concerned you're mine...

It's sad really, when you consider how hard Iowa has worked to eliminate illiteracy and yet the new governor somehow slipped through the cracks.

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Scenes From A County Road

Where US highway 59 and county road 175 overlap lies the sleepy, western Iowa town of Ida Grove. In a portion of the state that has never seen any sustained urban growth, Ida Grove continues to defy the slow death being inflicted on so many of Iowa's small towns. As the family farm races to extinction and the rural population dwindles, tiny communities that dotted Iowa's once vibrant countryside are starting to age. With that age comes decaying infrastructures with few resources to rebuild them. Fortunately Ida Grove has been spared that fate.

In the 1960s, Ida Grove saw the birth of Gomaco industries which was initially an offshoot of Godbersen-Smith Construction Company. Founded by an area resident of Ida Grove, Harold Godbersen, Gomaco would further expand the great fortune that Harold's brother Byron had already brought to this unique town. Between the two brother they would go on to bring over 900 jobs to a town of just 2350. Midwest Industries, Byron's Originals and the numerous spin offs of Gomaco have allowed Ida Grove to enjoy countless civic improvements that wouldn't have been possible without the brothers Godbersen's philanthropic endeavors. The tax base just wouldn't have allow what the brothers did privately. The following is just a partial list of the civic services Harold and Bryon had a hand in creating: the Skate Palace and Veteran's Memorial Lake, the high school sports complex, a newspaper, the country club house and bridge, the Ida Grove Airport, and the quirky castle architecture that adorn the Godbersen businesses and was replicated by countless others to give Ida Grove its' own distinct image. Even today in the years since the deaths of Harold and Byron their influence lives on, bringing prosperity to a corner of Iowa that time forgot.

As the various industries of the Godbersens began to grow, the elected officials of Ida Grove did something brilliant...they stayed out of the way. Instead of taxing Gomaco and Midwest Industries into oblivion and funneling that revenue through government bureaucracy, lawmakers put the future of Ida Grove in hands of its' citizens. In doing so, the entrepreneur spirit that once drove greatness in America took over.

The history of Ida Grove should be a blueprint for today's lawmakers who seem intent on meddling in private businesses. The Godbersen brothers showed that capitalism works and works so well that an entire community gets to enjoy the wealth of two men. Gomaco and Midwest Industries are nothing more than small businesses that grew beyond the normal definition of what we believe a small business to be. However despite achieving great success Harold, Byron and their respective companies always gave back to their community.

It makes you wonder if the story of Ida Grove can be duplicated in today's society? Can politicians curb their egos long enough to let the private sector handle the problems of our nation? From minimum wage to the tidal wave of massive corporate taxes, our leaders have sent a message to the American people: the private sector can not be trusted and only through government intervention can progress be made.

I disagree. I believe capitalism is working. I believe businesses already give more than they take. I believe that private sector can provide the services to the American people faster and more directly than the government ever could.

As proof, I offer the testament of Ida Grove...

Patriots In The Super Bowl

Congratulations to the New England Patriots for reaching their fourth Super Bowl in the last six years. Tom Brady will be looking to cement his lega....what?

Say that again?

Patriots still must travel to Indianapolis and beat the Colts to get to the Super Bowl? Beating the Chargers wasn't the AFC championship game? Oh....

Well as I was saying, congratulations to the New England Patriots for reaching the Super Bowl for the fourth time in the last six years as it appears they have a bye week coming up.

Friday, January 12, 2007

Hitting Below The Belt

In typical liberal fashion, Barbara Boxer [D-CA] decided to take a personal shot at Secretary of State, Condoleezza Rice, over the proposed Bush administration's increasing of troop levels in Iraq.
"Who pays the price? I'm not going to pay a personal price," Boxer said. "My kids are too old, and my grandchild is too young."

Then, to Rice: "You're not going to pay a particular price, as I understand it, with an immediate family."
Classless, childish and void of any dialogue to further the debate on the Iraq war. First, lets start with the personal attack on Rice for not having any children who will serve in Iraq. I don't want my leaders weighing important war time decisions on whether or not it will affect their immediate families. Check almost any liberal blog and you will see a button or an advertisement that says something to affect of "send the Bush twins." This attitude is clearly wrong. Bush and Rice need to make overarching policy decisions based on the greater good, not whether Barbara and Jenna will see combat and possibly die.

The war sucks. War should be avoided at all costs. Life is precious, but unfortunately there are times when a nation must call on its' military personnel to make the greatest of all sacrifices; putting their lives on the line. Whether or not a President's son or daughter will be involved in the fighting should be part of the equation for war, but it should not be the overriding reason for it or against it. Basing a military decision solely on the personal welfare of one person just isn't sound policy.

Finally, it has only been a week and a half since Democrats took power of congress and I am already tired of the political posturing on the Iraq war. Let me put it in simple terms, stop bitching about the war and do something. If the Democrats want this war to end, all they have to do is cut the funding. Done, no more war. I've had it with democratic leaders deferring the responsibility to President Bush. The President has made it clear the direction he wishes to go and has never wavered on that position. Right or wrong, you know where Bush stands. Democrats were largely elected on a desire to change the course in Iraq. Well, it's time to reach down, find some integrity and do something.

They bitched when they were the minority, they bitch when they hold the power. I don't suppose it would asking too much for them to just shut up and get some work done? I guess the Democrats are so used to the government coming in and saving them, that now they don't know what to do when they are the "government."

My New Blog

Writing for the Corn Beltway Boys is fine and all, but I found myself becoming more and more Republican by the day. So, in an attempt to stay in touch with my softer more feminine side I have created my own liberal blog. It's place where I can go where pixies really do exist and Ted Kennedy didn't kill anyone.

If you need a break from all the conservative crap spewed here on CBB may I suggest:

The Decade Of The Socialist Iowan

As you will see though, posting is a little light. However, I expect that to change now with the Democrats in power.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Blogging President Bush's Iraq Address Like A Liberal

So I heard from a friend that Bush gave some sort of speech last night about Iraq. I busy doing something else, but I know I would have agreed with him because we both are Republicans. However here I am with a conservative blog, so I feel compelled to write a response. Click on the President's address transcript and my analysis will follows the "More" tag.

Full Text Of President Bush's Speech

Yeah...what he said.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

The Des Moines Restaurant Scene

A regular CBB reader and good friend, IrishWalsh, has started a second blog called "The Des Moines Restaurant Scene." The blog is an outlet for him to keep his culinary expertise from atrophying. But hey, why don't I just let him explain it...


The Des Moines Restaurant Scene:
By: IrishWalsh

For those of you who live around my area, or are just fellow foodies I have started another blog called The Des Moines Restaurant Scene. I am trying to invite a few different people to contribute but for now it's my wife and I blogging. We will be writing about different visits to local restaurants and bars with our opinions and experiences from the point of view of people with loads of hospitality industry experience.

They aren't going to be scientifically methodical reviews, just talk about what's going on around town with events, food scene in general.

In addition to this I have added a "Stump IrishWalsh" link to anyone who has ANY sort of food question they can email and try to stump me. Want to make the perfect coq au vin? Pot roast always soggy on the outside and dry in the center? What the hell is "demi-gloss" anyway? Don't know when a steak is cooked properly? Sick of eating crappy store bought hummus? Whatever it is try and stump me and I will do my best. With the exception of baking I can probably come up with a answer for you and I love answering them so keep em coming. If I had the kitchen for it I would teach out of my home and put my 12 years in kitchens and Culinary degree to better use. But I don't so this is the next best thing.

So swing on over and add some input on restaurants, food, wine, beer, events, whatever as long as it has to do with the Des Moines food scene.


Tuesday, January 09, 2007

When Tiggers Attack

I am pretty sure Walt Disney has a greater chance of being cryogenically brought back to life than this teenager ever has of getting a date:

It seems Jerry Monaco Jr. and the rest of his family were trolling through Walt Disney World when a Disney cast member, dressed in a Tigger costume, unintentionally brushed Monaco's face with his padded, furry paw. At least that's how I see it when I watch the video.

Apparently though, it seems Tigger packs such a left hook that young Monaco required medical attention. Are you kidding me?
"Pretty hard," Jerry Monaco Jr. replied. "I could still feel it even though he was wearing the padded gloves."
It's a good thing Jerry Jr. didn't hit by Piglet or he'd probably be in traction right now. And my condolences to Jerry Sr. for a raising a boy who couldn't even win a pillow fight.

The only thing that truly bothers me is the status of the staff member in the Tigger suit. While the Monaco family is looking to hit the litigation lotto, this soon to be ex-Disney employee is going to be caught in the middle.

Other commenting: Ace Of Spades, Doug Powers

Monday, January 08, 2007

Republicans Sue For Breach Of Contract With America

WASHINGTON, D.C. - If the first few weeks of 2007 are any indication of what lies ahead in the coming twelve months for Republican lawmakers, it's going to be a long year. Getting run from office by the American voters last November and watching rival Democrats take control of Congress, was unfortunately just the start of the troubles that are beginning to mount against American's 'grand ole party.' The Drudge Report is claiming that the remaining Republicans still left from the 1994 election cycle are being sued by the American citizens for breach of contract. Lawsuit contends that after riding the popularity of the 'Contract With America' to election victories most GOP lawmakers failed to uphold their end of the deal.

Drudge was able to secure a portion of the class action lawsuit:
We the taxpayers of the United States, being the hereinafter referred
claimant "America," and being a party to the Contract with America, do
hereby file this class action suit against [the Republicans, the RNC?] for
material, malicious and intentional breach of said Contract with America.
John Boehner [R-OH] one of the remaining congressmen from the 1994 elections, said the lawsuit was "petty and bitter retribution for a campaign promise gone wrong."

"What I don't think the American voters understand is that what is said on the campaign trail, stays on the campaign trail," Boehner explained, "Promises are made to be broken and the 'Contract with America' was nothing short of a marketing ploy. I mean come on, the Democrats have barely been in power for a week and they are already reneging on some of their promises like a five day congressional workweek and increased troop deployments to Iraq. That's just the nature of politics."

Jeremie Jordan, one of the plaintiffs in the lawsuit against the Republicans, disagreed.

"We're not talking about a 'Handshake with America' or a 'Verbal Agreement with America,' we are talking about a 'contract,'" Jordan said, "it has become apparent they understand the word 'contract' about as well as they understand 'fiscal conservative."

Developing, more as it becomes available...

Friday, January 05, 2007

Mythbusting: The Right to Bear Arms? By Daren Jaques

In the video above watch an elderly woman be forcibly tackled and her gun confiscated following Katrina.

In the wake of Katrina, Louisiana and New Orleans law enforcement along with the Louisiana National Guard illegally confiscated lawfully owned firearms from people doing nothing but defending themselves and their homes from roving gangs of looters and rapists. As far as I know, the lawsuit engendered from the fiasco is not yet settled.
If this does not appal you, then shame on you. There is perhaps no greater need for a private citizen to be able to defend himself than in the Mad Max world of something like Katrina. Take note that literally thousands of guns and hundreds of thousands of rounds of ammunition were stolen by looters from sporting goods stores. These looting gangs were killing innocent people and firing at rescuers. So what did the city do? They looked up to see who the citizens were who had permits for the weapons and went and confiscated them - Right, because the law abiding citizens who register for permits were the bad guys... sure. You know I cannot begin to fathom the stupidity of this.

Here is the bottom line, the 2nd Amendment protects an individuals right to own a handgun. Period. Those agenda-driven left-wing politicians who tell you otherwise are either stupid, willfully ignorant, or blatantly lying. What myth am I busting? The idea that the 2nd amendment protects a state's national guard's right to firearms.

I will not take up this whole page with the historical and legal citations to back up my assertion, but if you don't believe me, then post me a comment. Let's do this!


Reprinted for my post on the Corn Beltway Boys

this post is going to hurt. You will feel great pressure and throbbing against your temples. A sharp pain will form a right above your eyes causing you to rub your forehead in an attempt to numb the suffering. Do not be alarmed though, this is normal because you have common sense. When common sense comes in contact with liberal and democratic thinking it causes a violent reaction. If you think for yourself and use your own brain everything should return to normal and the pain should subside after you finish reading the post. However you have been warned...

I mentioned previously that "not only do I write a brilliant, wildly successful, thought provoking, innovative, cutting edge, out-of-this-world, imbecile blog but I am also known to grace other lesser blogs with my presence." The liberal Iowa blogosphere is full of mindless sheep that regurgitate whatever the DNC or a democratic politician tells them. When I need a good laugh I like to surf their content and reaffirm that liberals don't a half a friggin' clue. They pretty much turn off their brains and nod approvingly. Harsh? Consider these passages:

Century of the Common Iowa:
Wash, Rinse, Repeat
There's a story yesterday on MyDD and Chris also wrote about, but it is worth repeating. Not extending Bush's temporary handouts to the most wealthy is not increasing taxes. I'd give back my couple hundred dollar tax break on my federal income taxes to get my property taxes, college tuition and loan payments, and the cost of other local and other state services to go down.

The first step in solving the budget deficit is to not renew these temporary tax cuts and to start investing in our future. So remember to repeat...

Not Extending Temporary Tax Cuts is NOT Increasing Taxes
Then from the Political Forecast: [and I included the entire post...all five lines of it]
Repeat after me
Let’s play a little game. Every Democrat talking about the Bush tax cuts, and hopefully repealing them, should repeat this phrase:

“Not Extending Temporary Tax Cuts is NOT Increasing Taxes”

If anyone says differently, please gently smack them in the back of the head. Do not consider this an incitement of mass violence, however, since some people are just dunderheads.
Yes, just repeat the phrase: "Not Extending Temporary Tax Cuts is NOT Increasing Taxes" and magical pixie dust will fall from the sky and make it true. Because if liberal blogs have taught us anything, it's that if you repeat something enough times it eventually turns into the truth.

If you remove a tax cut [that which causes taxes to go down] then logically taxes must do what? Anyone? Conservatives? That's right, they go up because the tax cut is no longer in place. This is pretty simple math here people. For example, if I pay $5 dollars in taxes and then receive a tax cut of $2, my new tax payment is $3. Now if someone comes in and repeals the tax cut, thus remove the $2 dollar savings, I am once again paying $5. For clarity and for those liberals that are reading this example, five is greater than three.

My favorite part of NoNeed's Wash, Rinse, Repeat post is this gem: "I'd give back my couple hundred dollar tax break on my federal income taxes to get my property taxes, college tuition and loan payments, and the cost of other local and other state services to go down." Wow, that's amazing, NoNeed has found away to take a two hundred dollar federal tax break and convert it into local tax breaks like tuition, property taxes and loan payments. You have to love his logic, it's comical really. The Bush tax cuts affect anyone who makes more than $15,000 [if you make less than that you DON'T pay taxes anyway...if you are going to repeat anything, repeat that]. So, if you made money then you received a tax break. However, NoNeed believes that just those that own property and those that went to college and have student loans should get a tax cut. Brilliant. Lets take a tax break that affects a majority of Americans and apply it to a smaller few.

I would also like to point out that Chris over at the Political Forecast [and NoNeed for that matter too] did not explain how repealing a tax cut isn't a tax increase, but really that is besides the the point isn't it? The only thing either one of those blogs really want you to do is turn off your brain and repeat the democratic mantra until you can longer tell your own thoughts from their's. Not here. Not on CBB. You are expected to think for yourself. I will write a post that comes from my beliefs. You will either agree or disagree, but you will never be expect to become a mindless drone. If you want your thoughts spoon-fed I highly suggest you read a different blog.

Like cattle to the slaughter...the democrats go marching in...

Thursday, January 04, 2007

The Red Herring Pt. III

[This is the last of a three part minimum wage post [four if you count Here Come The Clowns]. However, just because this post series is done, don't expect me to stop talking about the minimum wage. As long as I am a small business owner, it will be discussed on this blog.]

As a conclusion to everything else I have written, this post is more to get out my remaining thoughts, tangents, and beliefs. They won't necessarily be presented to form a definitive argument on the minimum wage issue, but rather a few parting shots and quick hits of ideas:

Let me state for the record that I stand behind my position that minimum wage should not be raised. So firm are my beliefs that I have even challenged those who support a minimum wage increase to give me a chance to prove my position in a real world setting. When Des Moines Register columnist, Rehka Basu, wrote a bleeding heart pro-minimum wage increase piece, I emailed her and presented an offer. I said if she could produce one person making $5.15 a hour for 40 hours a week, then I would take time out of my schedule and work with them to get a raise within their current job or help them find a better one. No response. When Oprah Winfrey did a show about people making minimum wage, I emailed her staff with the same challenge. No response. When I was an official blogger for the Gannett run entertainment magazine, dmJuice, I issued the same challenge to the Juice staff. No response. I also challenged Rep. Leonard Boswell [D-IA] when I met him on the campaign trail for the 2006 midterm elections. I got the official democratic party line on minimum wage, but no mention of taking me up on my offer.

If these people I just mentioned cared enough to write columns, produce TV shows and make campaign promises then why won't they help me help those making minimum wage? I contend that the market is working and if you truly wish to find a better job at a better wage then there is one out there waiting for you. Open up the help wanted section of the newspaper or walk down the street and you will find dozens of entry level jobs paying well above minimum wage. The catch, of course, is that it requires some personal accountability and responsibility of your own actions. If you are waiting around for the government to help you, to save you, then you are in deep trouble. May I offer the government's response to hurricane Katrina as an example of the type of help you will get.

No, people like Mrs. Basu, Oprah, and Rep. Boswell only care about those making minimum wage when it can sell a newspaper, boast ratings or snare a vote; otherwise they are callous in their actions. Not of these people will make another mention or show compassion for those making minimum wage once it is raised by the Democratically controlled congress until the next round of elections are upon us. Only then will they talk about the poorest of the poor and then only to take credit for raising the minimum wage. Their personal claims of success will not be dependent on whether or not any minimum wage earner improved their life, in fact it will be completely beside the point.

Don't confuse the minimum wage issue with big corporate windfall profits or CEOs making obscene money. Raising the minimum wage will not hurt the Exxons, the Microsofts, or the Enrons of the world. No, raising the minimum wage only hurts your neighbors. Your own friends and family who have invested their money back into your community. The average citizens who own the vast majority of small businesses in America. Their children attend school with your children. They pray next to you in church. They are committed to your town and to making your community a better place to live. I dare anyone to make a case that a national, corporately run business could impact Waukee in the same way that my business has. It can't be done. I am part of the town, down to the most personal of levels. My relationship with citizens of Waukee is symbiotic in nature, as we both need each other.

Nowhere is it said that the life must be fair. There will always be winners and losers. Those who strive for greatness and those who watch the world pass them by. The Constitution of the United States doesn't guarantee you a job or a living wage. Rep. Leonard Boswell defended his position on minimum wage with this condescending comment to me: "you look like a bright young man who will find a way to make it [a minimum wage increase] work."

Let that statement ring in your ears...those of us with ambition and drive are now expected to compensate for those among us that don't. Does that belief represent capitalism and democracy or socialism? I know what I believe, what do you believe?

Fools On Parade

Zero hour is upon us as Nancy Pelosi and the Defeatocrats have taken power. Nancy Pelosi told the LA Times this week that she was putting the House Speaker's gavel in "the hands of the children." Not sure whether she meant actual children or her democratic colleagues, but intellectually there really isn't any difference anyway. Now might be a good idea to define what a child is, because you can damn well bet Pelosi doesn't intend to put the gavel in the hands of unborn child. But I digress...

Rep. Jan Schakowsky [D-ILL] has a column on the Huffington Post explaining the Democrats position on minimum wage:
Nearly 15 million Americans go to their jobs every day caring for our children and frail old people, cleaning other people's mess, serving us food in restaurants, and for their efforts receive $5.15 an hour, the Federal minimum wage. If they work 52 forty-hour weeks, their annual income adds up to $10,712 -- $4,367 under the poverty level for a family of three.

Other Americans -- the CEOs of the nation's top companies, those with $1 billion or more in annual revenues -- made on average $10,712 by 11:02 a.m. on January 2, 2007, the first workday of new year. According to a report by Americans United for Change, those CEOs make $5,279 an hour, $10,982,000 a year, or 1,025 times more than their minimum wage employees. [I call bullshit, prove this sensational rhetoric Schalowsky]

It's hard to imagine any member of Congress objecting. After all, it's been ten years, the longest span ever, since the minimum wage was raised. In that time, we members of Congress have received cost-of-living increases that have raised our salaries over $30,000.

In the end, we will pass the minimum wage increase in the House within the first hundred hours of the 110th Congress. But not before we hear President Bush whine that such a raise must be attached to a tax break for business
Comparing minimum wage to congressional pay? A CEO's pay? Businesses whining for tax brakes? Hell, she even throws in the oil companies. I don't suppose it would be asking too much to actually debate raising minimum wage without using false arguments? How does a CEO of major company who does not employ a single person making minimum wage relate to me, a small business owner, that must somehow figure out how I am going to cover the increased costs to my business? According Schakowsky, even considering some tax relief from the government is "whining." This is who we elected to run this country?

I am afraid...very afraid. Not for the country, but for me, my family, and my small business. I get to bent over while the Democrats feed me a load of crap about how people making minimum wage need help. In typical Democratic fashion, the only way to help someone is through government assistance, because God forbid they do on their own.


I almost forgot to do my yearly bitch post about the United States Post Office. Each year around the Christmas holiday, the United States Post Office does something that really pisses me off: they advertise on TV. Nothing angers me quite like a branch of the government that bleeds red running ad campaigns against the private sector. So basically what USPS ads are saying is: "spend your money with the government and don't give any to UPS, DHL or FedEx."

I don't need advertising reminding me that the US Postal service exists, I already know. Small children know it. Hell, even people in Tennessee know it. I beg and plead with all seven of you readers, please when you send a package use a company from the private sector. The government SHOULD NOT compete in the business world. If the US Postal service was a private company they would have been run out of business in the 80s. There is little denying the USPS is the antithesis of how a business should be run

My solution? Strip the functions of the USPS down to single letters and small packages. Let the private companies handle the rest of the package shipping commerce in America. The ultimate goal being that we can someday downsize the bloated dinosaur that is the USPS and hopefully stop throwing some much taxpayer money down the drain.

Other added benefits of having DHL or FedEx handle your shipping needs that they still work on stupid asinine holidays like Christopher Columbus Day. Oh, man don't get me started on Columbus day or this post will stretch until tomorrow. Just like I am sure the postal employees spent all of Tuesday mourning the death of President Gerald Ford...

***URGENT*** Culver Inaugural Committee Needs Volunteers

As the liberal, Iowa blogosphere is a buzz trying to round up volunteers to help with Governor-elect Chet Culver's inaugural party, I decided CBB shall lend a hand. After all, we did support Chet's campaign for governor. Consider this a friendly public service announcement from CBB and don't say we've never reached across party lines to help a democrat in need. I do find it a little curious that people were willing to vote for him, but it seems going to one of his parties might be pushing it. I think I figured out why and if you read the letter from the inauguration committee I believe you will see it too...

On January 12th, Chet Culver and Patty Judge will be sworn in as the next Governor and Lt. Governor of Iowa. In celebration of this event, The Culver-Judge Inaugural Committee is planning several events in Omaha, St. Paul, and Chicago to celebrate. These events will showcase Governor-elect Culver’s belief that Iowa has One Unlimited Future [because 'one' is all we could come up with]. It should also be noted that unlike John Edwards who believes there are "two Americas," Chet "knows" there is only "one Iowa." He's seen a map. Once.

We are looking for volunteers who can make balloon animals and pirate swords, persons who like dressing up in clown costumes, know how to face paint a donkey, and can recite all the words to the Chuck E Cheese theme song. We also need backstage help during our featured entertainment for the evening: The Wiggles.

We need help from volunteers like you in order to make our events in Kansas City and Lincoln a success. We can provide free tickets to the Taste of Iowa and the One Iowa Gala [because we can't seem to sell them anyway] for those who volunteer. If you are interested in volunteering and do not have a life, please call Brian Jennings at 515-287-8667 or send him a note under your desk so the teacher doesn't see at

Thank you for your support and we are looking forward to seeing you at the inaugural. However, it should be noted that Chet has made it very clear he gets the first balloon pirate sword...

SUITE 476 DSM 50315
PHONE: 515-287-8667 | FAX: 515-953-0568 | EMAIL: INFO@CULVERINAUGURAL.COM

Trolling Other Blogs

Not only do I write a brilliant, wildly successful, thought provoking, innovative, cutting edge, out-of-this-world, imbecile blog I am also known to grace other lesser blogs with my presence. What can I say, I like to help out the little people.

While wading through the deep liberalism of The Pole Hill Sanitarium, got into a flame war on the Gerald Ford post. As good read [my comments, of course] if you have the time. However, my favorite comment on PHS is this gem:
Apparently, someone with a cell phone video camera was there and caught the ugly truth. From what I've read, this was as botched as anything else that has gone on in Iraq.
Botched? He's dead isn't he?

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

The Something Boat: A Rollicking, Frolicking Journey at Sea

Background: After downing a few dozen Mountain Dews and taking a break for hitting home runs in SNK's Baseball Stars, Daren and I decided to write a play. Much stupidity later we came up with "The Something Boat." Keep in mind, Daren and I were teenagers. However, if there is one thing this 15+ year old play illustrates well is that we were never funny. So, this humorless blog is nothing new...

The Something Boat
By: Daren Jaques and Jeremie Jordan
A Very Small Rocks Production

Light cascades down on an old Spanish style galleon. A large ship's wheel is seen at the front of the boat. At the far stage left the captain's quarters are found. The is the primary stage entrance. The other stage entrance is on the far side of the quarters.

As the play opens the ship "Lollipop" has just left dock. The captain stands at the wheel delivering a speech to his men about the nature of their journey. Present are his first mate Winston, his crew and a slave.

Act I scene i

captain: Life and liberty! Men, we seek haven in the arms of the sea. At the end of our desolate road there is hope of a new land. And our ship, the Lollipop, shall carry us there...for she is a good ship. Yes, we have a dream. Not of candy apples or sugar plums or an end to rat soup or a big hug from Mommy, but a..a...what was I talking about?

first mate: (nudging) Uh...hugs from Mommy.

captain: Oh yes, but what was my point?

first mate: Something about sweets sir.

captain: Sweets? Oh quite right, yes, umm...umm don't eat too many of them, uh they'll rot your teeth...that will be all, carry on.

(crew mills about then exits behind the cabin)

first mate: Just out of curiosity Captain, where are we going?

captain: Hell if I know, I'm just followin' Bob.

first mate: Captain, Bob sank.

captain: Hope you can swim.

Act I scene ii

The crew, the slave, and the traitor are on deck discussing a mutiny. Flotsam, our first crew member, speaks in varying accents the Jetsam (the other crewmen) comments on frequently. Both crew members lack intellectual capabilities. Jetsam wears an eye patch and walks with a slight limp. Benny Arnold, the instigator of the mutiny speaks to the crew and the slave over hears.

Benny: The blood of men has been shed. How many have fallen to a watery grave for this "new land?" Dost thou wish to join them? If not, we must rise to mutiny to liberate, emancipate and free ourselves of this...this...stuff.

Jetsam: Bloody good idea!

Flotsam: No, it's not.

Jetsam: Oh...right...(to Benny) you heard him you knave, it's a bloody bad idea.

Flotsam: Well...maybe not.

Jetsam: Yeah, uh...maybe not.

Benny: We must do it. It is not dishonorable. For what we are doing is the noblest of all acts...saving ourselves. For our captain is inept, unintelligible, inefficient and...and stuff.

Jetsam: Yeah and he ain't very good neither.

(They all exit behind the cabin murmuring agreement)

Slave: (overhearing, bursts into song as he swabs the deck)

The evildoers have wrought,
An evil plan to kill.
'Tis an evil thrill,
In an evil Pot.

The pot it 'tis this boat,
On an evil sea.
They plan a mutiny,
Can the captain float?

I am the minstrel slave,
Abroad the Lollipop.
The killers will not stop,
Because they all are knaves.

(The first mate enters from the captain's quarters to hear the song)

first mate: Mutiny? On this ship? Impossible...'tis a good ship. (first mate exits cabin door)

You Say Po-ta-toe, I Say Po-tat-o

What started out as a nice Bush-bashing piece for CNN on the failed hunt to for Osama Bin Laden, turned ugly when a staffer misplaced the terrorist mastermind's name with that of Obama - as in Barack Obama.

CNN quickly issued an apology and of course no one believes it was intentional. In fact, other than the headline, I won't make any jokes either, because while I might disagree politically with Obama he is and never will be a terrorist. I will even dare to say I have a certain level of respect for Mr. Obama. Oh sure, I believe some of the Democrats' policies to border on terrorism, but...wait...scratch that...I said no jokes.

Of course if you are looking for humor a simple typo isn't nearly as funny as what Sen. Ted Kennedy said a year ago:
"Why don't we just ask Osama bin -- Osama Obama -- Obama what -- since he won by such a big amount. Seriously, Senator Obama is really unique and special."
No wonder the Democrats are so clueless when it comes to terrorism... Sen. Kennedy, a senior leader, can't even tell the difference between a terrorist and a member of their own party. Alright...alright...I'll quit while I am behind.

Others commenting: Doug Powers [thanks for the YouTube link]

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Oh Dear God, What Have We Done?

The nurse who took care of Saddam in days and months leading up to his execution has come forth with tales of a softer , gentler Hussein. Gone is the 'Butcher Of Bagdad,' say hello to the 'Bambi of Bagdad...'
"He basically talked about his wife, and his children,'' Sgt Ellis said on CNN today.

"He was an avid reader. Loved to read and write. He had a lot of stories that he had written. He had a pamphlet that he wrote in every day and then when time came to visit him he'd read things to me,'' the army reservist said.
I am surprised Hollywood didn't rush to Saddam's aid like they did with Tookie Williams. I am sure Saddam could have written a wonderful children's story on mass genocide. Given time, Saddam would have probably been nominated for a Noble Peace Prize.
"That was my job: to keep him alive and healthy, so they could kill him at a later date,'' Sgt Ellis said

"I was kind of disappointed (by the execution),'' Sgt Ellis said on CNN.

"I thought that they would more or less put him in jail for the rest of his life to kind of stem some of the violence that I knew was going to take place,'' he said.

"He said he was a farmer when he was young and he never forgot where he came from,'' Sgt Ellis told the paper.
Yes, yes that Saddam was one grounded individual who never forgot where he came from. A simple man really...
Saddam "had a good sense of humor. You know, made jokes, you know. And he spent most of his time reading, and praying,'' he said.
Did you heard the one about the Shiite who walks into a Sunni bar with a salami under one arm and a pack of explosives under the other?
Saddam went on a hunger strike at one point, refusing to eat when guards slid food through the slot on the bottom of his cell door. But when guards starting opening the door, Saddam dropped his hunger strike.

"He refused to be fed like a lion," Sgt Ellis said.
Was anyone else surprised that it was CNN reporting this? Nah, me neither...

MISSING: Kevin Schmidt

Have you seen this man?

He's the elusive 3rd blogger here on CBB. He's 6' Freakish" with blond highlights. He was last seen around the November midterm elections drunk while playing with his Transformers and mumbling something about how "Charlie Rangel reminds me of Starscream."

As a staunch Indianapolis Colts fans, Kevin is probably wandering the streets looking for Colts' defense. If you see him, please buy him a beer...

Monday, January 01, 2007

2 Ply

Don't think the mainstream press can adversely affect public perception? Here's two news stories based on the same poll: gloom and doom / light and cheery.

H/T: Florida Cracker