Once upon the midway walking wearily, while the I watch the carnies slightly leery,
Watch the white trash walking, severely questioning what they wore,
Staring in amazement and laughing, with eyes wide and caustiously scanning,
I see only five teeth remain through the smile they make while they implore,
"Stop eying my 5th grade daughter," I mutter, she's not your next score,
The fair has barely started, I can only imagine what's in store.
A day to remember, on this day when it was almost September,
Buy an Oreo deep fried or a Twinkie on a stick for dollars four,
Already wishing it was the 'morrow, because of mass cash I must borrow,
Forty-five minutes into the five hours we must spend, the kids are starting to bore,
"Look a big pig or funny looking man...hey Dad I am starting to bore,"
The whining will reach a level that can't be ignored.
We went to find our seats near the stage, too many people I begin to rage,
A two hour wait to see the Raven of the Disney channel yore,
"Is it time to go?" is asked still 60 minutes from the start of the show,
I must give the mad props for starting the show promptly at four,
She came out rapping, singing, dancing across the stage floor,
To prepubescence screams crying "more, more, more!'
Merclessly the day starts winding, I hope the car we will have no trouble finding,
But past the carnies one last time we must walk, "you can't lose" they still implore,
In Metallica shirts that barely fit, they are relentless in peddling their s....
The hole in my wallet is deep and painful, and wonder what I did this fore?
Sunburned and tired with feet that are blistered and sore,
I've had my fill of the fair, no more!
No flippin' more!