Monday, August 21, 2006

Groupie

Well, it's official I have a groupie. He started stalking me after my brilliant post a few days ago dealing with the cordless power tool name GlenNnnnNnn Keennnannn. Apparently, Glen [aka Satan37, pictured] thinks himself tough enough to have newspaper articles written about his stupid personalized license plate, but once a blogger starts to comment on it that is crossing the line. Here is my first fan site, not exactly what I expected, but hey I guess I can't be choosy.

I will be honest it is going to be a test of my manhood to deal with the fact that my stalker is male. I guess I always hoped it would be a female, but a groupie is a groupie. I imagine he has notebook pages full of "Jordan N' Satan Together 4ever" and "Mrs. Satan Jordan."

Sorry, Glen I am a taken man, it's best that you just try on move on now. The pain of my rejection will numb over time and you will find another blogger to latch on to. Lets face it, we are too different of people for it to ever work. You're the prince of darkness, I straddle the lines of Christianity. You use profanity like a fifth grader, I graduated from high school. You like men, I sleep with my wife every night.

So, genius let me offer you some free advice: if you can't handle the blogosphere writing about your juvenile personalized license plates, then I suggest you don't have newspaper articles written about you.

Man, you are such a SMF [which could mean smurfs masturbating furiously, but it doesn't so don't get excited].

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