Monday, January 08, 2007

Republicans Sue For Breach Of Contract With America

WASHINGTON, D.C. - If the first few weeks of 2007 are any indication of what lies ahead in the coming twelve months for Republican lawmakers, it's going to be a long year. Getting run from office by the American voters last November and watching rival Democrats take control of Congress, was unfortunately just the start of the troubles that are beginning to mount against American's 'grand ole party.' The Drudge Report is claiming that the remaining Republicans still left from the 1994 election cycle are being sued by the American citizens for breach of contract. Lawsuit contends that after riding the popularity of the 'Contract With America' to election victories most GOP lawmakers failed to uphold their end of the deal.

Drudge was able to secure a portion of the class action lawsuit:
We the taxpayers of the United States, being the hereinafter referred
claimant "America," and being a party to the Contract with America, do
hereby file this class action suit against [the Republicans, the RNC?] for
material, malicious and intentional breach of said Contract with America.
John Boehner [R-OH] one of the remaining congressmen from the 1994 elections, said the lawsuit was "petty and bitter retribution for a campaign promise gone wrong."

"What I don't think the American voters understand is that what is said on the campaign trail, stays on the campaign trail," Boehner explained, "Promises are made to be broken and the 'Contract with America' was nothing short of a marketing ploy. I mean come on, the Democrats have barely been in power for a week and they are already reneging on some of their promises like a five day congressional workweek and increased troop deployments to Iraq. That's just the nature of politics."

Jeremie Jordan, one of the plaintiffs in the lawsuit against the Republicans, disagreed.

"We're not talking about a 'Handshake with America' or a 'Verbal Agreement with America,' we are talking about a 'contract,'" Jordan said, "it has become apparent they understand the word 'contract' about as well as they understand 'fiscal conservative."

Developing, more as it becomes available...

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