Wednesday, March 15, 2006

God Please Forgive Me For Writing About Cindy Sheehan Again, Part 2

My post as reprinted from DM Juice:

Few things tug at your heartstrings quite like a mother grieving the loss of her child. A cruel twist of fate that commits an offspring to the grave before the parent plays against the natural progression of life. Those that enter the world first should in turn exit first.

When this cycle is disturbed it can cause behavior that turns a historically normal mother into a raving lunatic lurking on the fringes of Michael Moore.com.

I have come to accept that my constant ridicule of Cindy Sheehan will be a sin which will require years of repentance to forgive, but God help me it is so much fun. Through my numerous connections I formed with my blockbuster other blog, In A Word, I was able to secure an exclusive Cindy Sheehan letter explaining what really happened a week ago when she was arresting again in protest of the Iraqi war. The following diary of events is the unabridged version of the post that appears on Michael Moore.com. May her insight cause you pause in what may otherwise be an unfailing support of our Liar in Chief, George Bush:

Yesterday began just like any other day for me. I awoke missing my son, Carey, and wondering where I was. Life as a media whore leaves you susceptible to waking up in strange places following an all night bender with Moveon.org. I still wait for the day they at least kiss me goodbye.

After getting my bearings I realized I was in New York City to protest something, somewhere, with some people I will hopefully never see again. Luckily the nice staffers from Michael Moore.com always supply me with my daily itinerary, so I haven’t had to form an original opinion in over 2 years.

After psyching myself up with the usual “Bush lied, people died” mantra, I set out into the street of New York City to do some good. I was marching on behalf of the People Adrift Without Normal Sensibilities and our main objective was to deliver a worthless piece of paper with some names on it to our US ambassador to the UN, John Bolton.

Of course, due to the fact America has been transformed into a fascist state by Nazi…er…Republican Party; I was arrested. It was at the time of my arrest that the emotions all hit me at once. I had lost my son Corky, my husband, my country, my rights as granted by the 18th amendment, and my lucky pendant with a picture of Hugo Chavez.

I had the joy of being frisked by the arresting officer. In fact, when it comes to being incarcerated, getting patted down is one of my favorite things. Being the ever vigilant activist that I am I requested the officer pat me down a second time, but asked him to go slower and to be a little more thorough. Coco would be so proud of his mother.

After putting forth one of my best crying performances of my career, I was released. With the help of great Americans like Michael Moore we have been able to secure a bunch of talk show interviews. Michael even said he might been able to extend my 15 minutes of fame to about 16 or 17, but in doing so I would have to sell him my soul. Of course, I agreed out of a desire to honor my fallen son, Casper.

I just wanted to write a letter to all my friend(s) and supporter(s), to let you know you can't always believe what you read in the press. I wanted to let you know my side of the story as presented by MichaelMoore.com with limited commercial interruptions.

Peace, and praise Allah,

Cindy Sheehan

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