Ames [CBB] - After having a less than joyous dinning experience at his local McDonald's, Johnathan Reed has filed a 2.4 million dollar lawsuit against the world's largest fast food chain claiming "the 'Happy Meal' didn't live up to its' name."
"I took my five year old son to out to lunch and he ordered a 4 pcs. Chicken Mc Nugget Happy Meal," Reed explained, "but after Timmy finished and I asked how his lunch was all I got was a 'fine.' Hardly what I would call 'happy'.'"
"The damn fries weren't 'fluffed,' the barbecue sauce was bland, and to top it all off they were out of the current iZ[TM] toys so my son a got cheap, Chinese piece of crap from last year's Disney flop 'Chicken Little.' Huh...Happy Meal, my ass"
Mr. Reed's lawsuit alleges "gross negligence" and "price gouging."
"I paid $3.49 for my son's Happy Meal. Considering what I got, would say the monetary worth of the food was about $2.28...$2.29...tops," Reed said.
When the Corn Beltway Boys questioned McDonald's Corp. over the pending lawsuit, we were told that it's "company policy not to discuss ongoing litigation" however they did provide us with this statement:
"While McDonald's certainly regrets any service or product issues Mr. Reed had during his last visit, we feel that he paid a fair market price for a kid's meal considering it was made by a pimp faced 14 year old with no job skills. McDonald's also questions the motives of Mr. Reed and others like him that hope to litigate themselves to wealth. Please bare in mind that our marketing department spends hundreds of millions of dollars to advertise to your kids just how great we are. Kids love us and no amount of frivolous lawsuits is going to change that. McDonald's wonders why any parent would risk potential group therapy when their child turns 25 just so they can find out their child hates them and harbors resentment over not buying them a crappy 67 cent hamburger with a cheap ass toy when they were 5 years old. McDonald's would like to think Mr. Reed would value his son's love and affection more than he does a few million dollars."
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